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micka-angelo

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look! a distraction!
follows it into the woods and is swallowed by a troll, while sitting inside I use a combination of dried gastro-chemicals and different bones to make adhesive and glue large bones together, creating a raft within the beast one uses to escape the scalding pain of the aciding belching stomach acid. Upon finding more survivors i proclaim myself the new leader, being the least emaciated. I then elect my right hand man, a feminist woman, and she doesnt like being called my second hand man, which is exactly why i call her that.
We go about building our civilisation, children are born and we feed after setting up a net beneath the opening of the beast's esophagus, catching food we would deem as edible or not.
We made a water cleaning and distilling device by collecting the fine hairs that lines the beasts upper stomache, some sort of residule growth of the hairs usually found in the airway as to prevent choking. Simulating a procedure i whitnessed as a child, the stomach liquids of the beast could be drined through a long line of these hairs, and after several times passing through them, the water emerged clean and drinkable. there was much rejoice, and for a time, it was good.
Although, as our population grew, we knew our supplies would grow short and hunger and thirst would grip us again, so i heralded plans to further investigate (literally) the bowels of the beast in search of new land we could populate.
My second hand man said it was folly, she insisted that all we would find would be shit and death. I laughed at my second hand man and called her a fool. She then beat me up. this happened often and most people just pretended it didnt happen which i really appreciated because my right hand man was really rough.
I then nominated my right hand man to front the expedition toward the bowel.
She wasn't seen again.
Sadly her craft was not air tight.
no-one suspected me, there was much rejoice and it was good for a time.
However, as predicted our population explosion meant quarters grew crouded and food grew thin, not to mention the beast seemed to be providing us with even less sustenance than before, and even the sea around us had seemed to recede. We created a vessel making glass from hardened mucus harvested from the membrane walls, fired in kilns where we burned the most dense of bones. We names the Vessel "the Auriella" because it kind of sounds like the name of that ship from that one movie with that McConohey guy. It was a bad movie, but living in the digestive tract of a monster ruins your imagination. the fumes i think.
After testing the craft by filling it with children and repeatably dunking it in the ocean and pelting it with bones, we were satisfied the fifth construct (auriella V) would be sufficient for us to travel into the never-reaches of our host.
I elected myself to lead, and left my new second hand man in charge in my absence. This one was actually a male, Tumtum, a second generation native to the gut, whom i had raised as my own child.
We journeyed into the green sizzling ocean, aware even the slightest leak in the craft could spell our doom. as the craft decended through the murky acidic brew, we saw before us the opening to the intestine. like a hungry mouth (bringing back much nostalgia for many of us first generation gutt inhabitants) it swallowed us and we found ourselfs in an alien world. (or, well.. more alien?) around us pink hairs dragged around the ship, and me and the others discussed the possibility of harvesting them for a more efficient means to get freash water. it was then we noticed these hairs were actually cutting into our craft. panic struck. although our craft had ample density, we questioned how long until the gradual desolving of the outer shell would last until we were all dissolved ourselves.
Our navigator blamed me, saying this was indeed folly, and i had sent us to our deaths  as i did my first right hand man. I rebuttled the claims by pointing out it was the fault of the navigator for bringing us via this route, which would lead to our end. no-one seemed to back me up and i then realized..."MUTINY!?" i roared, then drawing out my bone-constructed clockwork-style-pistola (one of my finest engineering feats). The men who were once my crew laughed at my weapon, stating that it only held two rounds (ok, two was the best i could do but i'd like to see you do any better with bone, stomach deffused glycerin and animal teeth) (and a buit of tendon) (oh, and that engineer i ate during the cannibal days of yore) i then pointed out this weapon was not meant for two of the six crewman, but for the craft itself. in it's weakened state, me firing at the apparatus walls  would surely send us to our deaths.
They bought my bluff. agreeing that they'd remain civil, lest i kill us all.
It was an uneasy passage for the next few ours, the walls grew thinner and we grew more and more anxious as to whather we would find anything in this god forsaken beast.
Suddenly, we can to a sudden abrupt stop, we were encapsuled by a strange pink bag-thingy. A beam of light penetrated the pink bag-thingy, and as some for of elastic from the old world, it streached open, psuhing us through. Many emotions burned within me, hope that we had emerged from the anus into the old world, that our craft would be crushed under the might of the sphincter, that upon escaping my comrades would once again turn upon me for holding them all hostage.
but then, we plunked downward. the confined of our craft cracked as we landed upon some surface, it was adrk and clouded us with a great stench. I realised we had not passed through the entire colon yet, and this was simply the passage from small to large intestine.
we emerged from the craft into a new world.
I quickly used my weapon to dispatch the navigator and the largest shipmate, once again giving me the size advantage over the remaining four. The remaining men vowed me loyalty, and i deemed this new land to be known as Colonica. The question was now, how do we make our way back to Gastonopia? We decided it best to set up camp.
we moved away from the waterfall where the small intestine secreated, moving further behind the colon. confused, as i was sure in my studies of biology and anatomy this should not be preseant. it then occured to me, the beast is omnivoris, but must consume such large quantities of vegetation it required an extended appendix in which to ferment fibre to further digest it. my thoughts stopped dead.
Ferment.
I ran down further into the appendix of the beast, and the third kingdom of the beast was discovered. Fermentistein. Great lakes of alcohole shimmered within the confines of rotting sweat smelling plant matter. We immediately traversed back to the colon to scrounge for tools we could use to harvest the alcohol, as i had formed a plant to make our way back to the stomache.
Knowing much fo this plant matter could not be digested by the acids in the stomache, we would create a new craft which was strong enough the survive re entry to the small intestine, and be propelled by acohol powered means to re-enter our homeland.
We soght out something similar the the mucus which could be used as adhesive, i demanded the three smallest members of my party sift through the piles of raw faecal matter, naming the fourth my left hand man. he, appropriately was left handed.
hunger was beginning to wreck us, as our food supply although rationed was beginning to run dry, by chance we stumbled across something most peculiar. Golden lumps within the faecal matter gave off an exquisite odor and an alluring texture that drove our burning hunger mad. I eventually decided our smallest would sample this stange matter found in the more disgusting, less appetizing matter.
After the first reluctant bite he seemed driven mad by a frenzy, consuming the whole potion without any concern where it had first come from. the strange golden lumps proved to be quite addictive to my party, and they were in ample supply. With moral at an all time high the crew worked tirelessly, the golden lumps seemed to give them extra energy. I had abstained from eating them, i mean, they were pieces of shit after all. But i noticed, the longer the crew went without consuming their portions of golden lumo, they seemed to become irrational, agitated and itchy.
I suddenly knew what I could do to regain my respect back in gastropia...
When the less consumable shit, especuially the darker, stinkier stuff, was boiled down in a vessel with alcohol and a small amount of the golden lumps, it formed an adhesive so powerful it would have perplexed the mighty thor himself. we went about completing our craft, I worked tirlessly creating a methein/alcohol powered propeller with which to escape the confines of colonica. I grew more hungry, as the others forwent their supply of rations in favor of the golden lumps, i enjoyed their rations and until now had no need of other sustinance. But now, my rations were running low, and desperation gripped me. Rather than eat the same sweet smelling shit as my collegues, i ventured further into the caves of Fermentistein, on my own with no protection which was foolish in retrospect. Abon rounding a bend i saw a small creature, gelatnus in nature, i watched as it seemed to drink in a pond of fermented twigs before disolving the twigs themelves.
Some form of bacterial colony i thought, then the creature turned toward me and i was horrified to see the face of my former right hand man, the feminist.
She had somehow been semi-consumed by the bacterial culture, which she had now formed a symbiotic bond with. I fled in terror at what may happen to me if i didn't run. her shreik of rage followed me all the way to colonica, where i remained never daring to enter Fermentistien again.
My collegues had completed the craft, and upon seeing me so emaciated from my fammine, they insisted i eat the golden shit. I refused, knowing if i began to eat it id become addicted like them, but also, i didnt like the idea of eating bits of poo.
shrugging off my squeamishness, they melted the shit and we passed it through a liquid siff to my satisfaction, rendering a purified form. the strange result almost glowed, and upon consuming a small amount i felt as if i had the strength of a thousand men, my vigor restored, we builtt a scaffold and pully system to raise our new craft (the auriella VI) and re-enter the small intestine.
Before leaving I made sure to collect and purify as much of the golden lump as possible, by passing it through the purifier seval times and letting it solidify we found a single bite would fill us with the equivelant dose of an entire lump. We mined the poo for all the golden lump we could, and filled the craft  until we realized there was only room for two of us to travel. My crew insisted they could stay, they weren't going to starve and with the new craft, they knew we could return for them.
My and my lefty entered the craft and with help from the three, (which involved lots of pushing from them) we re-entered the sphincter and the small intestine.
I tunred on our propeller and to our delight, the craft moves seamlessly through the intestine.
Upon our travels, me and my left hand man grew more and more dependant upon the purefied form of the golden lumps, the glowing lumps as we called them. i felt an itch unless i consumed it, i then realized i too, was addicted to the stuff, so i used my massively totally real self control and tried my hardest to ween myself off the delicious satistying morsels. I insted fead upon a green ooze i found that tasted kinda limey, i expected it came from the methain/alcohol propeller.
As we re-entered the stomach we were met with cries of disbelief and delight, I emerged and we were hefted up as heros, not only for finding new land and returning, but for solving the food crisis which, in our absence had grown far worse. fammine had gripped my people, and my righthand man tumtum had re-endorced cannibalism of the small. After smacking him a bit, i denounced cannibalism in favour of consuming the golden lumps. to make what supply we had go round, we would dilute it with whatever other food stuffs we could collect.

As expected the people loved the golden lumps and everyones stomaches were full and we were happy, and for a time, it was good.
But like all good things, the time came when our supply was running low we needed more tgolden lumps.
We unloaded what remained in the craft, around about a 6 month supply, assuming all went to plan in 6 months time we would return with more golden lumps.
Many volunteered to join the quest to colonica, excited to work in the mines and to cultivate the golden lumps and wok in the refinery.
Our civilization was once again in working order.
We began our decent back to colonoica, bringing with us a rope whith which to make along ferry/pully system to make delivery of golden lumps easier.
We penetrated the sphincter and emerged into colonica, to find the refinery fully constructed and the three original crew member happy to see us.
Upon shaking their hands they felt strange,a nd seemed pale and vague, dismissing this as a lack of social engagement, i released the new workers and production because prevalent and fast.
Families were whole again, and the colonica population was set to prosper. I saw the entry to Fermentistein was partially blocked, and taps protruding from the wall, the other, semi exposed piece of the entry guilded with bars. Upon my asking, the three told me strange creatures had emerged from there, trying to steal and consume the golden lumps. with the alcohol required to purify the golden lumps, it was too dangerous to venture there, lest they try and eat us and our bellies full of golden lumps, they said.
They explained they constructed a means to access the alcohol without having to enter the appendix, to which i told them "genius"

Upon looking at my second city, colonica, set to prosper i returned to the intestine to journey to my home.upon arrivale, the people were anticipation our return, and with the ferry in full swing supplies of golden lump quantified in mass and happiness was restored to the people of both colonica and gastropio.

for a time. it was good.

but one day, the supply grew less, then day after next, less still, until on the third day, none came at all.
Although the people of the stomach had more than 10 years supply, they went into panic and began stockholding as much as they could for themselves, and I was asked why the suppy had suddenly stopped. TumTum, Lefty and I mounted the craft and began the decent to investigate what had happened to the golden lump supply.
i noticed lefty and tum tum both seemed so different to how they were before we discovered the golden lump. i had succeeeded in avoiding consuming it in favor of what foodstuffs were aquired from the beast, but all other chose to feed only upon the golden lumps.
I felt a slight level of guilt, knowingly allowing my people to consume this expensive commodity, and it had left me in rule in favor of the other stronger and bigger people.
however there was ample suppy of that weird lime juice, i never realized everyone was building the alco-methanole engines as i did.
as we breached the sphincter into the large intestine, we were met with desolateness and stillness. no-one was in sight, the distillery was in tact, though the bars to fermentistien torn asunder. the refinery was smashed and unrecognizable, as if blow apart by some form of explosive.
We wandered the abbandoned reaches of the city, and saw not a soul. Only when we reached the mines did i whitness the first citizen. On all fours he crawl to us, grey and covered ina strange green slime, i recognized him as one of the first men who volonteered to join the three, to work in the mines. he looked up at me, dazed, as if he didnt recognize any of us anymore.
We asked what happened and still he just staired, before letting out a blood cuteling screech
His arm moved like mucus, and gripped TUMTUM by the face, disolving his skin and tearing him flesh from limb.
My and lefty began to run, only to see the miner completely abandon his human shape in favour of a gelatnus form to consume what was l;eft of tumtum.
As we bolted back toward the craft, more screeches sounded behind us, and i was too frightened to look back.
We rounded the corner, more screams came from the distillery, and vague green shapes oozed from the broken bars and leaked from the silver taps of fermentistein.
As the craft came into sight, lefty fell to one knee.
when i grabbed him to try and drag him with me my hand passed through him, burning me as it did so. I yelped in unbearable pain, then whitnessed him begin to melt. He looked at me and cried for help but before long he was naught but green ooze. I stepped back slowley, then, almost as if he sensed my movesment his body partially reformed, from the wast up.
"lefty?" i asked gingerly. His green eyes locked on me, and another inhuman screech rattled my skull.
I ran, not waiting to see whether he followed or not, way i saw it i had but one chance to reach the small intestine. i clambered inside the craft to hear a bang as something crashed against it. looking out the porthole i saw them. all of them. faces recognizable and faces not, all green oozing monsters, and i suddenly understood. When i cast the feminist down here she must have survived on the golden lumps, and being exposed to the fumes from Fermentistein, she had metamorphed into the monster. the same fate awaited all who consumed the golden lumps.
As i saw all those years ago, the monsters began to dissolve the fibre of my craft, and I took the only opportunity i could. I opened the alco-methain engine and ignited its contents.
I dont remember what happened next.
Only a flash.
when i opened my eyes i guessed i was dead. i could see the heavens themselves, and i knew the doom that awaited me at the pearly gates when i would be cast to hell for turning my people into abominations.
feeling returned to my limbs.
My limbs? I looked down, i was covered in excruciating burns, charred flesh and mostly, shit.
I realized i could see REAL stars.
I used the last of my strength to sit up and i saw before me the crippled body of the troll, bleeding profusely from the rectum.
Its eyes were dull and lifeless, and i finally understood, i had escaped the confines of its body. after nearly 4 decades within, i had finally escaped.

but to what end, i do not know, for my people were still trapped inside.
well, suck to be them, i thought.
Then i traveled to the nearest hungry jacks, to eat something that wasnt already half consumed or made of shit.
Or was it?








hahaha. im not a writer, dont judge me.
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Misdirection: A distraction from something else by micka-angelo, journal